The Man Who Murdered Santa ClausThe Man Who Murdered Santa ClausDid you ever take a turtle apartTo see what makes it tick.Did you ever kill a small childBy beating it with a stick.Do you like to step on the ants you seeAs you walk along the road.Did you ever tear the wings off a butterflyAnd feed it to a toad.Do you ever do mean and cruel thingsThen stand there and snidely laugh.Like catching a great big snakeAnd cutting him in half.Or setting fire to a cat thatYou dipped in kerosene.If you have done all these thingsYou are still not really mean.Compared to the man whoMurdered Santa Claus.----------------------------------------Written by Mmpratt99 deviantart
The Hermit and the ToadThe Hermit and the ToadOn the pestilent bank of a slow green sloughLived a hermit who had only one shoe.In a deciduous tree he made his abode,His only companion was a pea green toad.The hermit dined on cheese and blue berry pies,The toad mostly ate weevils and flies.By the light of the moon they studied the stars,Told monstrous lies and smoked big cigars.Everyday without fail at a quarter past three,The toad and the hermit climbed down from the tree,Went to the water and got into a boatWhich was made of an ancient Navy rain coat.By the means of this small leaky coracleThey rowed to an island the home of an oracle.Long ago they had reached this decision.It was all they could do for they had no television.In my opinion the oracle to the T.V. is far superiorBecause an oracle isn't always showing pictures of your interior.Written by Mmpratt99 deviantart
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